Although it’s rare, when I get sick, boy does it knock me flat on my back.

Recently, I was graced with one of the “kid bugs” (kid bugs is a vernacular term used by parents of small children to describe mutant strains of viruses that start, grow, develop, and become infinitely reinforced among the human petri dish of kid populations in schools and other kid activities, and they are typically stronger, more penetrating, and more sinister than your average illness-causing agent). No matter who you are, or how healthy you are – kid bugs find you.

A funny thing happened when I recently got sick – I mean really sick, not just a sniffle or a little cough, I’m talking high-fever, dizziness, body-aches, flat-on-my-back, puking-my-guts-out, glued-to-the-toilet kind of sick. I had an interesting and seemingly obvious insight:

When I’m sick, anything I think, say, or do is not reflective of my true and normal self.

In a recent bout of illness, I was having some pretty crazy thoughts. If you know me well, you know that I live on the positive side of things. When I was sick though, I was having completely opposite thoughts – thoughts of failure, despair, and negativity. I was saying to myself things like “I will never accomplish my goals.” Or “I’m not good enough or smart enough to accomplish my biggest dreams.” Or “my biggest dreams will never happen for me.” These thoughts were highly uncharacteristic of me, and I had to remind myself that when we get this sick we should avoid doing the following:

1. Self-Evaluation – Times of illness are not times to be doing any kind of introspective thinking or self-evaluation. First, your body has dedicating its full resources to fighting the foreign agents in your body. You already feel bad physically, trying to do any kind of self-reflection in this state only adds emotional gasoline to the fire.

If you do think negative thoughts about yourself in times when you are sick, you need to just let those thoughts pass and consciously counteract those thoughts, by telling yourself out loud, “These thoughts are not real”, “These thoughts are not me”, “These thoughts are not normal”. Do not let negative thoughts sink in, don’t even speak them aloud, because, once again, when you’re sick, you are not in your right mind. Your body’s chemistry is configured for fighting the bacteria or virus in your system – not mental, emotional, or spiritual self-evaluation. In those times, you don’t have the resources mentally, emotionally, or spiritually to look at yourself in the purest or best light as if you were in normal health. Under those circumstances, self-evaluation is counterproductive to your healing process.

2. Evaluate others – In the same way that you are not in your right mind when you are evaluating yourself, you should not evaluate others for the same reasons. You are not clear to evaluate others fairly, objectively, and in a way that they might appreciate. So that is not the time to evaluate and place judgment on those closest to us. When we are sick we may be tempted to be more critical of those around us. Once again, do not speak those thoughts aloud, and especially not to those we love. It’s not the time to bring up all those times when you’re spouse squeezed the wrong end of the toothpaste, or wasn’t good at listening or anticipating your every need and want. It’s not fair to them, and you wouldn’t appreciate it if you were on the receiving end of that judgment. So once again, just let those thoughts pass and don’t dwell on them.

3. Make Major Decisions or Strategic Plans – When you’re sick you need to focus on one thing and one thing only – getting better. When you’re sick it is your body’s way of saying, “Alright, we’ve done enough. Time for a break now.” The only major decisions you need to be making are:

• Bed or couch?
• Tea or NyQuil?
• Sleep or a movie?
• Drinking fluids or going to bathroom?
• Cough drops or cough syrup?
• Vitamin C or Echinachea?
• Staying in pajamas or taking a shower?

If you’re focused on anything else, then you’re focused on the wrong thing. It is not the time to be planning your year, or strategizing how to unseat your competition. Because you’re mind is foggy at best, you will make mistakes, miss key items, and there is a law of diminishing returns, and when you are sick, you reach that point of diminishing returns pretty quickly. So, no major decisions or planning when you’re sick. Resume those important activities when you’re in better health, and when you’re fresh and clear minded. Otherwise it’s counterproductive and a waste of time and energy that you should spend getting better.

4. Work or Overwork – One time I was sick, and I was physically achy and felt terrible. But, I decided that I was going to push through work anyway. I was under deadline and didn’t feel I could afford the time off. If you’re a high-performer you understand this temptation, and have had similar thoughts before. I pushed through and paid a very high price for it. Because I did not rest, one night I ended up in an ambulance on the way to the hospital, diagnosed with full-blown pneumonia. Why? Because I didn’t rest when I was supposed to. Trying to work over work when you’re sick, only prolongs the illness and you run a great risk of getting worse. It took me about a month to fully recover.

Evaluative thinking, strategic planning, or work of any kind requires our best. These require clarity, objectivity, and our whole, healthy self including our best mental resources. When you are sick, you are not in your right mind. Even if you think you are, you are not. You’re cloudy at best. Call the office, and let them know you won’t be in. Besides, wouldn’t you appreciate it if someone else got sick, that they stayed home and didn’t breathe their germs on you? Go and do likewise.

What follows is my personal formula for getting better when I do get sick. What I have found is that the following significantly reduces my sick time:

• If it’s early enough in the sickness (day 1 or 2) I might actually try working out to see if I can sweat out The foreign agents (this has worked for me many times in the past)
• Intentional rest and sleep
• Plenty of sleep
• Literal gallons of fluids (tea and water mostly)
• Just enough food to get by (with the exception of a good chicken noodle soup – in my humble view, eating too much takes away your body’s ability to fight infection)
• A healthy diet of good movies and binge-able shows
• NyQuil at night (but only if I really need it)

This all sounds great, but what if you’re in a care-taking role – like being a mommy (at any stage), a stay-at-home dad, a single parent, or a caretaker of an elderly parent? All of these folks have it tough, because they often can’t afford to take a sick day. So for those in these types of roles, I would recommend trying to get some help from a spouse, a sibling, a parent, a friend, or some other person you trust. People want to help you, they really do, especially in times that you are vulnerable. You just need to ask. There may a be a quid pro quo for this, that is – you may need to help someone similarly when it happens to them, but at least you can get some help when you need it most.

I also suggest doing some advance planning like picking up some ready meals from the store (quick prepackaged dinners or pizzas) to feed your family or loved ones – something easy that someone can prepare with no thought and little time. It might take a little advance planning, but you’ll thank yourself for it when those times do come.

Question: Do you have any special advice for when someone gets sick? Either how to prevent it, get over it quickly, or take care of those around you who depend on you? You can leave a comment by clicking here.